Solve All Problems

Sometimes I have to remind myself that thin people still have problems, even medical ones.

I was born with a bad hip joint; it didn’t form correctly in the womb. And my doctors failed to diagnose it until I eventually tried standing up and my upper thigh bone started jutting alarmingly out of the side of my body under the skin. My mom knew something was wrong, I was a quick baby otherwise – she said I started talking early, but I didn’t seem to want to walk and she knew there had to be a reason why. They finally diagnosed the problem (obviously) and fixed it with a lower body cast that I fortunately don’t remember wearing, though I’ve seen relatively horrifying pictures of it.

As a result; yay, I can walk… but the joint isn’t great. It’s not as good as a joint that formed while I was still on the inside so to speak. Sometimes it hurts… a lot, like this time of year when the cold damp of October and November are settling into my bones. On the upside, I can predict when it’s going to rain. As my Stepson is fond of saying “the hip never lies!”

I always tend to fall into the trap of thinking; it would all all all go away if only I were thin. The joint would magically not hurt anymore, ever again. But honestly that’s kind of stupid… the stress on the joint would be less for obvious reasons but I will always have hip displasia from an improperly formed ball and socket. A lack of body fat cannot fix that fact.

I used to do this when I was a kid too. I thought the only reason I was unpopular was because I was fat. Forget the fact that I was shy, awkward, frumpy and sort of strange – no if I was thin it would all be totally perfect, always. I’d have a boyfriend, countless friends and perfect skin too.

Getting skinny will make me healthier, especially long term – but I have to keep in mind that there’s no magical single fix for all my problems. Even beautiful people can be dreadfully unhappy; just look at Brittany Spears.